Holder of Warfare
In any city, in any country, enter any recruiting station or military base that you can get yourself into. Ask the officer at the front desk to speak to the "Holder of Warfare". If he responds, "I'm sorry, but he is KIA", then do not despair. Your death shall be over with before you hit the ground. If he instead calls two MP's and tells them to escort you to the stockades, your journey will continue. They will lead you outside the base to a seemingly empty bunker; order them to open it as a general would order a lowly private. If your voice has enough power, then one of the MP's will open the metal door that leads into the bunker. If not, then you will be executed without hesitation. Descend into the bunker and tell the MP's to wait outside, for they shall not be able to shield you from the horrors that lie in that forgotten tomb. Walk down the stairs leading into the bunker military style (straight posture, facing directly ahead) and do not stop, no matter how long it seems. If at any point you begin to hear cannon fire, then even a long, torturous death would seem merciful compared to what you are about to experience. However, if you hear a faint drum cadence, continue to march. The farther you walk, the louder the drums will get, until they finally become so loud and unbearable that you would be tempted to gouge your ears until you hear no more, at which point they will stop. Stand up straight and salute, even if you see no one in front of you. After about seven seconds, you shall hear a gruff, tired voice signaling "at ease". Do so and a spectral figure shall slowly emerge from the inky darkness. It will be a figure clad in camouflaged combat fatigue of excellent physical condition; 6'7 in height, broad, muscular shoulders, rippling arms and legs. Do not be fooled, however, for this man is no longer among the living. "Report, troop!", the soldier shall scream. It is then that you must reply, in a loud and confident voice, "Sir! I come to seek power, Sir!". If you don't, then the soldier will show you that all those muscles aren't just for looks. "Then drop and give me fifty, maggot!", the soldier will respond. I suggest you oblige him and begin your push-ups. Count off each one. If he places his boot on your back, continue to push, no matter how hard it becomes. If he doesn't, then you have displeased him, and will be disposed of. If you mange to complete your workout, the soldier will ask you to stand. You must shout, "Thank you, Sergeant!". The soldier will then nod and present you with a combat helmet, a frag grenade, and a 1911 .45 caliber semi-automatic handgun with an extra magazine. Take them, for you shall have dire need of these blessings soon. After a few moments of catching your breath, you will be blinded by a light brighter than any star could produce, and shocked by the loudest of explosions. As you open your eyes, you will be in the most hellish and bloodiest of battlefields. Troops clad in gray will run ahead of you and be mowed down by a passing gunship. Take cover beneath their dead bodies as tanks roll by and bathe the area in machine gun fire. Over your shoulder a barrage of missiles will rain down from passing aircraft, which will in turn be consumed by a hail of anti-aircraft fire from behind a nearby building. Pull out the pistol and put on the helmet as you sprint your way towards the nearby town; take care not to use up all your ammunition, for you cannot take any from the ones whose lives you end. Make your way to a building resembling a school and take cover as troops in blue engage the ones in gray. You will see them and witness their insatiable blood-lust. If they run out of ammunition, they will begin cutting each other with their bayonet and striking each other with the butts of their rifles, not stopping until they completely disembowel their opponent. With your only grenade in hand, run up the flight of stairs on your left, avoiding any fire you may receive, and head towards the roof. Once you get to the door leading to the rooftop, say a quick prayer, pull the grenade's pin, and kick down the door. With the grenade in hand, let all the troops uniformed in blue on the roof top see you, and outstretch your hand so they can see your formidable armament. A high-ranking general will approach you and ask you to state your demands. If you ask for peace, prepare for war. Instead ask him to present the Holder of Warfare. He will smirk at you, but simply gesture towards the hand with the grenade and he will comply. A small child will be brought out to you. Place the pin back into the grenade and take the child. He will be trembling with fear and appear to be starving. Pay no attention to these illusions. Pull out the pistol and point it at the child's head. Squeeze the trigger without even an inkling of compassion. If you have been deemed worthy, the gun's safety will be on and you can let out a sigh of relief. The child will present you with a rusty old medal. That medal is Object 219 of 538, and with it untold violence will follow.